Archive for November 2009

is there anything in godly that requires degodification? (religiorant)   Leave a comment


i think i’ve exhausted all the god bullshit – but is there anything godly and religious in particular that you would like a blasphemous interpretation? I’m not promising anything, but it seems i’ve exhausted the majority of topics, up here in my brain….

i mean i could keep going on about the same stuff and i’ve a few dozen blogs left that are still unfinished – but the whole thing is just boring – god died a long time ago to me – sometime in the 90s – not sure when – but that’s when god died for me…

sometime soon after I heard that the universe is expanding ever faster, and that there is a “force” pushing the universe apart.

what’s that? A force? there’s a force everywhere in the universe? that would make it …..

The Force….

see! there is some reality to Star Wars


Posted 24 November, 2009 by manabrau in Religion Sux Arse, The-Force

the gay marriage debate.. (religiorant)   Leave a comment


mostly written 28th April 2009, mostly …

I have *never* seen as big an issue as the debate over gays getting married, where the people bitching about it more than likely, HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH GAY PEOPLE WHATSOEVER.

Most of these fuckers trying to stop gay marriage, when asked, have said that they have never even met a gay person, that’s a bit like how all those christians claim that “god hates fags” and yet, they have not even read the bible, much the same way that the world has been gripped by Islamophobia, and yet, how many Muslims do you know personally? I know of one, and u know what? she seems like a fairly decent sort of person and I used to know some gay people, but not any more. Last I heard was that the only openly gay person I had ever known, had killed himself.

I *so* don’t give a fuck if gays get married, and yet, there’s a whole bunch of chrischuns that *do* give a crap that these homoseckshuals, that they’ll *NEVER* meet mind you, *are* getting married.. (uhmm.. can you say “mind your own fucking business” already? well? sticky beaks? nosey nuisance? hand in the cookie jar spreading your morality across the world, morality that you DO NOT even follow, absolutes my arse.. inerrant word of god MY ARSE)

there isn’t enough love in this world and yet there are cunts in this world that are trying to make legislation against certain forms of it!! Oh, and since fucking when was marriage a chrischun thing anyway? Does the definition of marriage in the dictionary say “Marriage: an exclusively christian union between a man and woman”..


i’ve been reading some chrischun blogs lately and well, what’s the fucking problem with all of this gay marriage shite?

since when was someone else’s relationships, someone you’ve probably never met and never will meet, since when was that ANY OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS?

i have no vested interest in any side of this debate, i’m not gay, i’m not married, i’m not chrischun, at least, not for long time… (maybe i should write a blog as to the “why” about that?)

so i don’t care if gay ppl get married AT ALL

what i care about is bigots pretending their religion says that they can be bigots…


firstly: where does it say that marriage is a “christian” thing? turn to any dictionary and is the definition of ‘marriage’ a “christian union of a christian man and a christian woman”? well?


secondly: the christians don’t like it when “the gays” want to have a christian wedding performed by a priest/pastor/preacher/whatever because it says in the bible that gays are an abomination. bigotry is built right into chrischunanity, so it’s hard to blame bigots for being bigoted when they their religion dictates that they be bigoted, but here’s what i don’t understand about *why* gays would want a christian or religious wedding at all in the first place…

if somebody regarded me as an abomination because their religion arbitrarily says that I am an abomination, without even giving a reason, then I would say “fuck you” to that person, and if that just happened to be my religion as well, I would be doing some serious re-evaluation of my “religion” if that’s the sort of attitude my own religion creates towards me… but then again, that sort of attitude prevents me from being brainwashed in the first place.

it’s simple, chrischuns don’t *want* gays in their ‘club’.

1. Abhorrence; disgust.
2. A cause of abhorrence or disgust.

Say it out loud with me… an *abomination* .. and just for good measure…

1. One that is disgusting, loathsome, or repellent.
2. A feeling of repugnance or loathing.

chrischuns think gays are *disgusting* – imagine talking to someone who thought that you were *disgusting*?


chrischuns think gays are disgusting because they *are* gay, and that’s it. there is *NO* actual reason.

does the bible list an actual reason for *why* gays are an abomination? no it doesn’t… but feel free to correct me, as always, if u can…

so, let me get this straight for all the kids reading this at home, not only do chrischuns actively regard gay people as an abomination, but guess what? …. The bible does NOT EVEN LIST AN ACTUAL REASON for treating the gay community like a piece of shit.

So much for “treat others as you would have them treat you”, hey? Seems that bit of the bible doesn’t apply to gays. (or Muslims, or atheists or …)

I *know* for a fact that there are people out there who do not have a problem with saying they would hang gay people from trees and use them as a piñata. while these people may say these things because they deem them to be funny, i seriously doubt the victims of violence towards the gay community find it funny.

Good thing this chrischunanity is a religion of peace, hey?

Imagine if it were a religion of indifference? or worse, a religion of hate? (of course nobody would admit their religion is a religion of hate)

Even if I was a *devout* chrischun I would not be able to seriously keep identifying myself as chrischun if I were gay. No way, uh ah.. *shakes*head* .. not at all…

Soooooooo given the way that a small group of chrischuns treat gays, why would gays *want* a religious marriage? why? why why why? isn’t that a bit like a black dude growing up in a family that is involved with the KKK? well, isn’t it?

Apparently there are some churches that will do gay marriages, but why? an abomination, disgusting. why why why?

The gay community should take this opportunity to *MESS* with all chrischuns

what they should do is declare that they will *only* ever have civil marriages, and they won’t *ever* have a chrischun wedding, making special mention that they are *not* welcome to be a part of the religion of “peace”, the religion of “understanding”, the religion of “love” itself, the religion that teaches “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”.

And, of course they should make *extra* special mention that they would like to be a part of this tolerant religion and it’s good will to all mankind, but somehow, being regarded as an abomination, as disgusting, as abhorrent and repulsive, is not really the sort of tolerance that they want to be part of, and that, in fact, chrischuns can keep their bigoted millennia old ideas to themselves..

so of course when the church openly agree to this…. it will set a precedent that religion *deliberately* segregates society and singles out individuals for being “different”.

as long as one christian regards even *ONE* gay person as an abomination, christianity will be regarded as an abomination as well….

end of story…

Posted 24 November, 2009 by manabrau in gays, M.S., Religion Sux Arse

choices for the future of the planet (science v religion)   Leave a comment


us sciencey people seem to spend a lot of time defending our position, but why? it’s probably going to change, and we’ll need to explain it all over again…

eg. evolution: we keep finding new stuff all the time, and we keep needing to explain this shit to the mockers and the doubters and the dumbarses

but instead of defending the position of science, with science, take it down to their level…

don’t try to change their minds – take their dumbarse fears and interpretations and give it back to them in their faces and tell them that you don’t give a flying fuck if “god did it!” – so even if there is a god, we want to know *how* god did it!

because you know, a small minority of us, well, some of us are pretty damn smart, and ALL of the ppl on this planet can not keep using up this planet’s resources – so either

a) stop using up all the earth’s resources and stop having so many babies; or

b) let us smart arses figure out *how* to feed and clothe and house all of you!; or

c) combination of the above

it’s pretty simple – but they are your *only* two choices to have a prosperous future for humankind

the choice is yours, take it or leave it, because if you don’t, soon there will be so many people that war, disease, famine, genocide, riots and numerous other horrible things that could happen on large scales will be inevitable.

when there are too many animals of one species, what do we do with them? we “thin out” the numbers …

don’t kid yourself people, don’t think that there isn’t a similar point where things get so bad that we need to “thin out” the human numbers .. you’ve heard the conspiracy theories of nefarious organisations deliberately spreading Bird Flu, AIDS, Swine Flu etc, what would the purpose of such a thing be if those stories were true? To reduce the population, and inaction could very well be used as a weapon in these doom and gloom scenarios.

so is the planet going to stop fucking for population control, or are we gunna let us scientists get on with our jobs?

and you know, there are enough planets and moons and such out there that all you groups who think alike can have your own world! how about Planet Vatican? hey hey hey? you know you want it…

Posted 23 November, 2009 by manabrau in Religion Sux Arse

my encounter with Jesus!!! (religiorant)   Leave a comment


mostly written, 14th Oct 2009, mostly….

i “used” to be a “christian” – well actually I don’t remember myself ever actually being christian, it was only later on when I discovered that I was a christian that started the eventual losing of my religion.. which wasn’t much of a rebellion actually, as there wasn’t anyone to argue with ..

see my first problem with christianity, was that there was two flavours of christchimpanzeeanity of which i was aware.. Roman Catholic and Church of England… WTF?! NO!!! they’re all supposed to be together, aren’t they? .. so the seed of doubt was planted for religion to fail, and it wasn’t like I believed in god or Jesus, at least for any significant amount of time.

but what I do remember about the brief time I was a *believer*, and this was most likely a dream, so it’s actually possible that my whole “believer” phase was one dream, but when I was about seven or eight or nine or ten, or thereabouts, I first heard about god and or Jesus and that it or he was my deity or saviour or whatever it was exactly how a child thinks when the concept of god is introduced.

this could all have been a dream long after i first heard about god / Jesus , but

The disturbing thing was that being a believer gave me “power” – it was a rush….

i only remember a snippet of the dream, and it’s more of a feeling…

and the feeling is what it would be like to have “hostile” people closing in from all around you, so you are under attack, and you are looking down at the ground, but u can’t actually see the ground as it is covered in long grass, so it’s impossible to run away as you just can’t get your feet off the ground high enough to step over the grass to make the required steps in order to run.

So you are stuck where you are, you have to make your stand, right there.

So as you are looking down you see these people closing in on you out of the corners of your eyes through the grass as it drifts back and forth in the gusty breeze.

But these people are ‘normal’ looking, it’s not like they are terrorists or a bikie gang or escaped prisoners or anything sinister, if anything, they are dressed in rather bright baggy t-shirts and big baggy pants, as at least one of them is dressed like that, and this one person you’ve spotted is a kid, probably a chubby Samoan or Maori teen about thirteen?

But regardless of what they look like, somehow they are still “hostile”, so you suddenly stand up and lean right back arching you back right over so your shoulders are facing upwards, and you are leaning back as far as you can without falling, and then a bright white light lightning bolt hits you and/or emanates from you as you lean back with your arms flayed wide like you being crucified by this light.

However, this energy bolt doesn’t hurt you – it charges you up! gets you going! it fills you with righteousness, you are clenching your teeth and your fists as tight as you can, as this energy/light whatever it is wrapped around you becomes tangible, such that you can hold it like it’s a weapon, and you can feel the power rushing through you as you feel the power of this weapon, and you *know* that you can destroy the world with this power and in that moment……….

you know…

you know what this energy-light thing is that is encompassing you, you know that there is a “presence” in this energy, you realise who this being is, you *know* who this energy is, who it is that is alive as that energy, and that person wants you to use this power, and they want you to use it *now*…

of course u know who it is….

it’s Jesus….

come to destroy the world…

utterly …

and *you* are the conduit, *you* are the lightning rod absorbing the wrath of God, *you* are the literal soldier of christ, you are the literal god warrior, *you* are the crusader of light.

The alpha and the omega, is *YOU*.

*YOU* *are* *Jesus* – at least in part, the *earthly* part – and *YOU* are now an active part of God, mind, body and soul, and *YOU* are to conduct the very essence and power of God, to destroy the world over and over and over.

God’s very blood flows through *your* veins and vengeance is why you are here, you are going to reset the Earth back to how it was and start again…

…and you are going to start right now…. and these kids with their brightly coloured baggy clothing are the first sinners to deal with… but you’re not sure what they have done exactly, you’re pretty sure it was something to do with them looking at you funny, and they may have called you a name…

most likely a dream, and not, an actual thing that happened – but i’m not really sure – *winks*at*the*nutters* – so i thought i’d put that disclaimer in there…

i should also note that the word “evil” is the best one word description to approximate that feeling in retrospect… ‘evil’ was the feeling I got from believing in god, Jesus or whatever it is the cool kids call it these days, Yzwksjkwkl, Yehyeh, Yeeehah, Youwah .. YES-U-R …. Yes-you-are!!!

and the nearest experience I can think of today, is the same “rush” I get when listening to say,.,, Slayer or Metallica or TOOL or Van Halen, something like that ….

but that was pretty much the only god/Jesus experience I can recall, but imagine what would happen if that sort of experience happened regularly to someone? to an adult person?? an adult christian person?

is this what the fundy experiences all the time?


Posted 21 November, 2009 by manabrau in M.S., Religion Sux Arse, T.A.

a perfect god doesn’t change… (religiorant)   Leave a comment


a perfect god doesn’t change

in case you haven’t noticed, i like to take the piss out of religion, and one of the things i love in this regard, is taking ppl literally at their word when it comes to their beliefs.

i say, we hold these guys to their eternal and perfect god to the letter of “perfect” and “eternal”

((exercise for reader: does the bible actually say god is eternal, all powerful, all knowing, perfect??))

i wasn’t intending this initially, but i thought I’d put the definitions, I usually use coz it comes up first in google

Dictionary: per·fect (pûr’fĭkt)


1. Lacking nothing essential to the whole; complete of its nature or kind.
2. Being without defect or blemish: a perfect specimen.
3. Thoroughly skilled or talented in a certain field or area; proficient.
4. Completely suited for a particular purpose or situation: She was the perfect actress for the part.
     1. Completely corresponding to a description, standard, or type: a perfect circle; a perfect gentleman.
     2. Accurately reproducing an original: a perfect copy of the painting.
6. Complete; thorough; utter: a perfect fool.
7. Pure; undiluted; unmixed: perfect red.
8. Excellent and delightful in all respects: a perfect day.

Dictionary: e·ter·nal (ĭ-tûr’nəl)

1. Being without beginning or end; existing outside of time. See synonyms at infinite.
2. Continuing without interruption; perpetual.
3. Forever true or changeless: eternal truths.
4. Seemingly endless; interminable. See synonyms at ageless, continual.
5. Of or relating to spiritual communion with God, especially in the afterlife.

1. Something timeless, uninterrupted, or endless.
2. Eternal God. Used with the.

just checking that the words haven’t changed meaning, they would seem to have not changed..

(is it just me or are those pronunciation things eg (ĭ-tûr’nəl) supposed to mean anything? they’re more complex than the word they are trying to represent!)


if god is perfect and has been around for ever, then how could god have made the universe?

let me explain….

something that is perfect doesn’t change – right? god doesn’t become less perfect, doesn’t become more perfect! so what changed after a trillion to the power of a trillion years to the power of a trillion etc years that god felt it necessary to stop this incredible feat of doing absolutely nothing, and create the universe, just for us? if we truly are a recent addition, then exactly what is this claim of perfection in god?

In order for a perfect god to do something, it has to change it’s mind and interrupt it’s perfect state.

eg. god sits there perfect in it’s glory in heaven, but it has to open it’s mouth up and speak the words to make the universe happen, so then what changed, what interrupted this stream of god’s perfection? If you were perfect, would you need to go and do something? A perfect god doesn’t have time to do things, it’s too busy being perfect!

Essentially what i am saying is that if something is perfect, that perfect thing does not change, if it does change, it’s not perfect. So if god did make the universe, it’s not perfect, or if it did, then making universes is what god does *ALL* the time, which would make us not special and unique at all.


and even if something did change and we just ignore that tiny blemish in the perfect being, well why didn’t god get the inspiration to create us just a tad bit sooner? so god has been around for all those aeons, like forever, but suddenly at some random point, RECENTLY, god suddenly thought to make a universe? but why didn’t god get it’s act together, about an eternity sooner? (if that makes sense?)

if i was god, i’d be getting onto this whole creating the universe thing pretty damn quickly!! and if god did wait all that time, then why isn’t it still waiting now, the chances are that it should still be waiting, right?

that’s a bit arrogant of these god believers, isn’t it? god created a universe billions of light years across, after waiting, all that time, just to make us, just so a subset of us would worship it. eg two thirds of the planet don’t even believe in this god the same way …. and the ones that do, don’t quite all see eye to eye either, *anyway*

so isn’t it reasonable to assume that since the perfect god goes and does stuff (ie. it supposedly made us) it could have made and destroyed billions of universes, right? after all, eternity is a heck of a long time to sit around and do nothing at all…. so it stands to reason that if we are created by god, we are just the latest universe in a very very long chain of them, and that we are not special, that this supreme creator of the universe did NOT do all of that work and did NOT wait all of that time, just for the christians on this planet!!!


if there is a god, and it’s perfect, and it’s been around forever, it could have been designed and programmed such that no matter how far back in it’s memory it looked, it found *something*, even if it was a record that nothing happened. in computer terms you could “tell” a program that it was perfect and that it knew the answer to everything.. ask it anything, it will say, perhaps, “god did it” as it’s answer, and it would be right, according to it’s own parameters. or maybe god doesn’t know what it itself is going to do, as it’s being controlled itself?

if god was created, who is to say it was not designed to think it was the ultimate power in the cosmos? how would it know otherwise? how could it know? it could be programmed to be oblivious to there actually being a creator, it could have been created such that it would not seek to find that answer in the first place.

how does god know it wasn’t created?

how does god know it has been alive forever?


so after this eternity of doing nothing – this perfect being that could do anything at all – this god suddenly decided it was this good idea to create us? by simply speaking the universe into existence?

no, the all knowing god knew right from the start .. oh wait … there was no start when it comes to god, so uhmmm…

did god attain perfection? and then some stage later decide that god was now perfect? or was god always perfect?

something that is always perfect, doesn’t have flaws, that’s what the myspaztaztic crowds of chuns keep telling us – but the christian argument at times would appear to be that things that are complex can’t possibly have come about by chance so uhmmm…. if god is perfect and has always been perfect then doesn’t that mean god itself was created?

you can not start with something that is complex, it can’t start perfect – it *must* evolve – coz if it didn’t – magic is the only thing that explains the alternative, the only other place where something can be perfect and eternal is where…. ???

the only place that this god we keep hearing about could possibly seem to exist, is in the mind of those who believe in it, which is quite easily, the most likely location that god has ever existed.

a perfect god can only exist in one place, that’s in your head, in your imagination!

Posted 17 November, 2009 by manabrau in Religion Sux Arse

Letting global warming happen?   Leave a comment

Letting global warming happen?

I’m no expert on world climate, nor am i an expert on what would happen if the sea levels and temp did rise (would there be more hurricanes and cyclones? how many people would be affected? where would they go? etc etc), and to be honest, this could be totally wrong, so if we keep that in mind…

..from what I’ve read about global warming if we keep going the way we are, we will have to deal with a sea level rise of about two metres over the next hundred years or so…

in countries with strong infrastructure, that’s probably not going to be a massively big deal, especially if it happens over decades and action can be planned in advance etc..

however.. in third world countries a lot of people live on low lying river flood plains as that’s where their food is grown, these places already flood nearly every year anyway, it’s expected!

but, a significant portion of the world lives in these areas, so if the sea levels go up, they will have to move inland or perish! 😦 Some of these low lying countries are already over crowded, a huge push inland of millions of people could lead to famines and wars. For instance, there’s not much high ground in Bangladesh at all.

Land areas effected by Sea level rising

also effected would be low lying regions of Indonesia, Thailand, Egypt, Pakistan, Iraq, and all of these places have high population densities already.. moving these people elsewhere would be an extreme problem to those affected.

from the various speculations on the interwebz, the average population that would be affected if the sea level were to somehow rise two metres today, is about fifty million people, which would probably mean that another fifty million people would be affected by having to share the land with these new arrivals … soo lets say a hundred million people world wide would be affected … not a small amount of people.

…, but if we ignore the displacement of millions of people for a moment, if the temperature does go up, doesn’t that mean there will be more moisture in the air?

now correct me if my high school science is rusty, but hotter air can hold more moisture, and with the temperature up, more water will evaporate from the oceans, and with more water in the air, it stands to reason that it’s going to rain more often, right?

now I know that as the temp goes up so does the temperature at which it can rain also goes up as well, but hello, moisture into the air during the day, wouldn’t that all rain down at night time? hmmm… maybe i’m just being stupid

Water vapour at wikipedia

sure we don’t want all those people along coast lines to have to move or have them stomped upon by mother nature, but what is happening to this planet?

it’s *drying* up isn’t it?

There are deserts that haven’t seen rain in decades on this planet, don’t we *want* more rain? I think there is a desert in Chile that hasn’t gotten rain in a hundred years!!

Here’s a good article about global temperature change

Now i’m not saying that if it rains more, it’s going to rain on the spots that need it, but it’s a start is it not?

So if the temperature goes up, sure we’ll get more storms and floods, but if it brings rain to the frikking desert doesn’t that mean that trees and grass can grow again, thus the deserts will *stop* growing and allowing more rain forests to grow??

Now i am certainly not saying go and dirty up the planet and *make* the temperature rise on purpose, but if we have more rain, doesn’t that mean we can feed more people? Clean drinking water is a major problem in Africa, but it if rains often enough, those local communities can store their own drinking water and rivers will flow again bringing fresh water.

What if the temperature were to drop, wouldn’t that be worse? Aren’t places cold enough already? If the temp stays the same, aren’t the deserts just going to keep getting bigger anyway? The Rain Forests shrank during the Ice Ages, there’s some evidence that the Amazon turned into savannah grass land.

Here’s a graph of temp/carbon/dust levels over the last 400,000 years

just what sort of conditions did the Amazon and Congo and all the rain forests form under anyway?? do you think it was during the ice age? bzzz! no!! where are all the rain forests? near the equator, right? where it’s hot!

Some cool info about the biggest rain forest, the Amazon…

so if we have more areas with hot enough conditions to suit rain forests, don’t we then create more natural carbon absorbers? not to mention that more ocean surface area from the higher sea levels means more area to absorb the carbon and more moisture in the air means more clouds and more clouds means more heat is reflected back into space in the first place…

the planet self regulates, but like i said at the start, i have only a very basic understanding of what would happen long term, but if the temperature goes up, it *will* mean that we lose coastal areas to the ocean, but won’t we also “gain” inland areas?

isn’t a whole chunk of the planet uninhabitable because it’s too frinking cold or dry to live there? Imagine if Antarctica became suitable for *farm* land? I’m sure Siberia could take a few refugees too, gawd, why don’t they move Bangladesh to Siberia?

of course if the temp goes up, it’s likely that the animals that are accustomed to having the wilderness to themselves will not enjoy the spread of mankind onto their turf but sheesh, i can’t think of everything. but if each country had their own sufficient supply of water for everyone, isn’t that one basic need that is met? don’t people go to war over water supplies?

lack of clean water means ppl are forced to risk drinking dirty water, drinking dirty water can lead to dysentery, which leads to death if not treated. lack of any water at all means farms don’t get watered, and if no there is food, people go hungry and eventually die…

I’m going to go out on a limb and say that the temperature of the planet could stand to go up a degree or two……..

if there *is* a conspiracy about global warming, wouldn’t it be more beneficial to those shady “powers that be” new world order types to *keep* the massive populations pre-occupied with their squabbles over basic needs? Maybe when it gets really bad they will come to the “rescue” and form their world government on the premise that since the world is in crisis because of an extreme lack of clean water, that the richer nations *must* share resources with other nations, and foot the expense of getting it there?

I’m sorry to say it, but if Africa keeps going the way it is, then aren’t we going to end up with another massive famine again? actually it’s already bad

This cycle will keep repeating, and eventually countries will need to look out for their own people as their own natural resources dwindle.

so I say *let* the temperature go up, podgy fat arses like me would have to lose some weight to handle the increase in temperature but this is a good thing.. and people are bound to bitch about having mozzie season all year, or even finding out what a mozzie is in the first place,

and what are we worrying about global warming for anyway, if it gets to be too much, we can just call up China!

Chinese scientists artificially induced the second major snowstorm to wreak havoc in Beijing this season, state media said, reigniting debate over the practice of tinkering with Mother Nature.

Posted 15 November, 2009 by manabrau in global-warming, Science

have you recently given away god? (religiohumorant)   Leave a comment


have you recently given away god? NAUGHTY NAUGHTY!!!

this is a rant that i can’t be bothered to make make sense… (legit use of a double “make”??)

here’s something I know by heart… i’ve no idea what it means, but I know it because it’s in a Jam & Spoon track “Muffled Drums” from “Tripomatic Fairytales 2001” and I’ve listened to that album at least a hundred times, possibly a few hundreds of times… apparently it is the opening paragraph to a book … i keep forgetting what the book is called…..

muffled drums beat out a nerve scratching rhythm and red lights flickered hypnotically in the underground temple of Hades, where five thousand ragged worshippers knelt and abased themselves and ecstatically pressed foreheads against the cold and gritty cobbles as the trance took hold and the human venom, rose in them…. the drums…

these people are praying to what god I don’t know, i’ve not read the book….. I think of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom when I think of this image, you know, the scene where that guy gets his heart ripped out..

I never really had a “real” religion – because Music is my religion. I claimed *music* as my religion, possibly even before I was ten. Jesus just wasn’t cool enough, Jesus didn’t give me goose bumps down my spine when I heard the opening seconds of a song I was really in the mood to hear. Indiana Jones is far cooler than Jesus. Don’t get me wrong, Jesus is cool, but Indiana Jones, *way* cooler…

Jesus and his sky daddy failed to move me spiritually, but The Eagles, The Doors, Boston, Split Enz, Australian Crawl… I shall read now from the book of “Sirocco” where our beloved brothers, Higgins and McDonough said

“You think it’s going alright
You think it’s going fine girl
You think there’s nothing in it for you
I hope you don’t
I hope you don’t mind
Gonna get you come around baby
Wanna see you through it
Not makin’ any promisses maybe
That’s only in the movies, movies

Things justa
Don’t seema
To be going right”

o’ yea…

but back to the whole praying from that book i quoted, I see that scene as a metaphor for christianity, or any religion that demands that it is better than everyone else’s for that matter … kneel down and submit to this god being? i was taught to be humble which supposedly was from a christian teaching, so if anybody were to kneel down and pray to me i would be embarrassed! so an all powerful being who knows they are all powerful, why would they want to be praised other than to stroke their egos? … maybe god ejaculates every time you stroke his ego when you jerk off pray to him? is that why it’s always raining somewhere on earth?

oh wait.. what was the blog about again? giving away god… ok…

you don’t *have* to give away god you know .. you don’t have to throw away the teachings of Jesus, or Buddha or Muhammad or whoever it is you used to pray jerk off to, they should just be a part of who you are – analogy: you read a fucking book, you don’t go dwelling over the contents of the book for the rest of your life, everyone has their opinions – take what you like from religion and ignore the rest…. you can just drop the label and carry on as you were before when u let go of religion.. nothing should change…

if the Gucci label falls off your favourite outfit, does it stop being a Gucci?

and as to the matter of god – *ultimately* there’s always going to be a point where god has to be invoked …

except I don’t invoke god, not really, my god is “I don’t know” – whenever I say “I don’t know” it could mean that god did it, but I’m at about 99% sure that it was not god, but I won’t be so arrogant to exclude the possibility completely.. and I’m certainly not so naive and arrogant as to believe what some religion says about god!!! fuck that – I’m just a *little* bit smarter than people from two millennia ago…

the only true answer you can give for any question about god, is “I don’t know”.. does god love me? I don’t know.. did god create the universe? I don’t know… does god rah rah rah?? I do *not* know…

but more importantly – i do *not* care

seriously don’t kid yourself about what god wants.. the christian bible is severely limited in it’s applicability to modern day society… sorry, but here’s an blunt anecdote:

a couple find out their kid is going to be born with some fatal genetic condition, something that can’t easily be fixed, eg. half a brain, no legs and no arms, with it’s heart on the outside, all of which you can find lovely pictures of on the internet should you care to search for them, so if the mental image of those words are not enough, you can always explore further. Now this couple choose to have this child, regardless of the extreme likelihood the child would be still born, or the natural birth process (mother refuses caesarean) would traumatise the child and kill it soon after birth anyway, point is… the kid isn’t going to live long and if it does, it’s going to be in horrible pain or it will need care 100% of time…

Now that sort of situation wouldn’t happen often but it *does* happen, so with that in mind, if you were god, what would you be up there saying to this nice christian couple who seem to think that all life is precious?? If life is precious.. u wouldn’t call a life lived in pain precious, would you? that’s not life, that’s torture…

I’d be saying “Look the tech is right there available to you!! I gave you lot brains to figure out how to look after yourselves so you can prevent this sort of shite from happening! it’s called SCIENCE people!!” .. but heyz, that’s just silly ol’ me… what do I know about being god? for a start if i’d been around forever i’d certainly have used that time to think about how I could trick everyone into being nice to each other.. .

from Futurama “Godfellas”

BENDER – I bet a lot of people pray to you huh?

GOD – Yes, but there are so many asking so much. After a while you just sorta tune it out.

BENDER – Y’know, I was God once.

GOD – Yes I saw. You were doing well until everyone died.

BENDER – It was awful. I tried helping them. I tried not helping them but in the end I couldn’t do them any good. Do you think what I did was wrong?

GOD – Right and wrong are just words. What matters is what you do.

BENDER – Yeah I know, that’s why I asked if what I did – forget it.

GOD – Bender, being God isn’t easy, if you do too much, people get dependent. And if you do nothing, they lose hope. You have to use a light touch, like a safecracker or a pickpocket.

BENDER – Or a guy who burns down the bar for the insurance money.

GOD – Yes, if you make it look like an electrical thing. When you do things right, people won’t be sure you’ve done anything at all.

I agree, any god worth it’s heavy metal head-banger weight in gold would be so clever as to make sure we’ve got no way to tell one way or the other if it was god or not… it’s a *god*, right? I just wouldn’t know *how* to let people run amok and do whatever the fuck they wanted and have them praise me for doing nothing in the here and now.. I would be embarrassed to be the christian god…

oh but back to Indiana Jones and how they were mining for those sacred rocks? .. I mean what was the point? weren’t those rocks going to bring forth Armageddon or something? see.. just like praying to the christian god?

do you *want* Armageddon to happen? do you want all those people not privvy to this little known fact where ppl have little to no christianity, that you have to give your soul to Jesus by name in order to be saved for all eternity?

if the end of the world came right now, like when global warming happens two days before the day after tomorrow (adobe, where’s my sarcasm font?), that’s 4 billion people into the lake of fire… Satan would spend years refurbishing the Halls of Hell after the sudden influx of party goers, might need the Chinese to induce a snow storm in Hell just to get it back to the regular searing flesh temperature.

In heaven all the interesting people are missing.
–[Friedrich Nietzsche – German philosopher (1844 – 1900)]

gotta luv Nietzsche, the only philosopher I made a point of to “study” – so I began to read his stuff and it was like, “wait a second, that’s how I think” … “god is dead, and *we* killed him” it’s not about us killing god literally, it’s about us not being true to these principals that *we* created, and yet we pretend that we have adhered to them… ??

so i thought i’d rather explore all of the philosophy thing myself – as it was too boring anyway… better off making up my own philosophy!

this is one of many reasons why i don’t have a problem with giving away or not being involved in the religion thing in the first place, I don’t think I live up to the standards of christianity anyway, but then again I don’t go around telling people to kill themselves for being so “stupid” as to not give my soul to Jesus, so there’s no way i want to be associated with people like that, so it’s a win-win situation…. i’m not good enuf to be a christian but i’m better than a lot of the loud christians so it doesn’t matter

it just doesn’t matter

and you may feel bad about “sinning” down here on earth, but you won’t be even thinking about that “sin” in heaven let alone actually doing it… god let’s shit slide down here, at least for the time being, but in heaven, different story my lubblies… he *knew* Lucifer would betray him, just from a stray thought wasn’t it? i can’t control my brain, I’d be out in a second simply for thinking about something that would eventually lead to thinking about a sin… oopps.. do we have free will in heaven? so uhmmm.. i bet there aren’t many ppl in heaven, I bet it’s just one Mexican dude with a broom standing around going “Oh I so dired, oh I so sleeepeeee” ..

no i’m not drink.. drunk even

can you name me one feeling you like here on earth that you can take to heaven, and why do you think it’ll be ok in heaven?? can you take your lust to heaven? your sloth plus your twenty dozen other vices? is there going to be music in heaven? there won’t be booze, drugs, what are you going to talk to god all the time are you, what are you going to talk *about*? you and everyone else going to take turns talking to god?.. you going to be with the perfect partner in heaven? nope, what about all those people that died at a young age who thought they were going to be with their honey’s in heaven forever? what if your hunny went on and found someone else? what if what if what if what if?!?!

maybe this is why marriage is “sacred”, you know? hmmm – it worked out so much better when the parents arranged weddings coz then you get to find your perfect partner first time out onto the factory floor and then you marry them, fuck them, haves kids with them, and then stay with them forever until death do you fucking part? and if you do lose your partner at a young age, you might as well close up shop and not bother looking for a new love coz ya hunny is waiting for you in heaven …

ooppps… that’s if they got in…

I mean it’s always possible that they didn’t – so you could end up wasting your life here on earth waiting to get old and die so u can see your hunny but then when u get to heaven it’s .. “oh no i’m sorry Mrs Jones, your husband ate pork on Friday once.. so sorry.. but not to mind we wipe your brain and all your emotions as that’s the only way you can possibly enjoy heaven now”….

welcome, to the nice vegetable patch in the sky …

you don’t need to give away god… you need to kill it..

the true god is waiting for you, whatever the fuck it is… and Jesus… his teachings were cool, but so was Gandhi, John Lennon, Buddha, Star Trek, Star Wars, Galileo, Hawkings, Sagan!! but that bible, none of it was written by Jesus at all, was it?

when i was a kid, I’d read about legends, like King Arthur, Robin Hood or books from Tolkien later on in life … it’d be so great to be able to “beam” the stories into your head as fast as the brain can handle them, that’d be so trippy to “read” the Lord of the Rings in half an hour…

but things in the bible, those things were written down decades after the events, and there is no very clear history of early christianity, so in fact, the bible has it’s very authenticity in question as entire books were removed at the command of some Pope millennia ago as well… there’s a Book of Thomas kicking around… Thomas aka Judas Thomas aka Jude Thomas aka The Twin aka the twin whose other half was Jesus… hey that’s what wikipedia told me

and half the new testament, was written by some dude who claimed he saw god, and named himself a disciple of Jesus, but it’s actually very likely that this dude probably never even met Jesus for any length of time, and yet half the christian bible’s new testament is written by this dude, just where did he get all this shite from? I don’t care if it’s 100% good stuff – who the fuck is Paul and why is it called christianity? that’s so funny, I’m thinking I’ll start to actually laugh about it… in about a decade..

At best the bible can *only* be third hand information, just thought u should know, by the way…

god -> prophet -> scribe -> bible -> idiot misinterpreting bible

there’s three degrees of separation in there somewhere … but it’s much worse than that, there was no such thing as English two thousand years ago, you know? .. and only clerics and other godly people were taught to read back in the day, so only the god damn priest could read the bible to you anyway, right?

why do u think all the scientists of yesteryear got into so much trouble for teaching what we commonly know today? Religion was what allowed these people to study and teach their blasphemy to the masses, ironic that the Church funded a lot of educational institutions back in the day. Galileo studied and taught in Christian universities .. imagine being up against the whole schbaggle of fundie christians when they are the idiots in power??

it’s not really that long ago we were in the dark ages… and much to my disdain the dark ages linger in pockets all over the world… and i make reference to fuck sticks that think space is an ocean, that the earth is the centre of the universe, that the planets travel around on invisible rails with god at the fucking wheel and the only reason that the planets don’t slow down, is coz god has his foot on the gas pedal…

hate god, hate *their* god to death if u must, say, “fuck you god” “fuck you and your god”.. and when it doesn’t smite you down as suggested by it’s believers, you will know the truth, because just how *can* u know anything about the real god?

and when you say fuck you god, if there really is a god and it’s listening to everyone’s thoughts simultaneously, i’m pretty sure it would laugh and it would know u aren’t talking about it… i’d be actually tempted to find believers get them to hold my hands and then I’d chant some blasphemy and then say “STRIKE ME DOWN GOD!!” and wartch them squirm…

and if there really is no god, then that actually makes the universe so much more fucking completely fantastic, because that means that the universe made itself..

my god is “I don’t know” .. which, according to Lt Cmd Data, saying “I don’t know” is the beginning of wisdom …

ps. this is *so* not what I first thought about when I had the idea for the blog, in the other room… it was something to do with… analogies of something… i think… if i remember i’ll write that blog later

Posted 13 November, 2009 by manabrau in Religion Sux Arse